“We haven’t seen you in forever!” she exclaimed, crushing me in an unwelcome bear hug.
I stepped back from the hostess, pasted on a fake smile, and told her I’d be going to the kitchen to fix myself a drink.
“Help yourself, honey! You know you’re just like family to us!” she gushed.
I mentally throttled her, thinking, “this is MY family’s restaurant, you overbearing nitwit. You don’t get to tell me I’m like family.” A sigh of relief escaped my lips when the broken swinging door clinked to behind me. No one would touch me back here or tell me I’m “like family.”
“Haven’t seen you in a while!” said one of the prep cooks, as I grabbed a cup.
“Oh, yeah,” I said. “How are you?”
“Can’t complain, can’t complain. How’s the family?”
I took a deep breath. Was I ready for the reveal? Why not try it out in the kitchen? “I’m pregnant again.”
“Say what? Didn’t you just have a baby?!”
“That was almost a year ago. I’m pregnant with number 3 now.”
“Do I need to have a talk with your husband?” he joked, walking back to his prep station.
I opened my mouth, not quite sure how to respond. It wasn’t the first time I’d heard such a comment, and I had no idea what people were expecting in reply. The answer that sprang to mind was quickly discarded. “Oh, yes. Please ask him to stop having sex with me. It’s becoming painfully clear that he’s not making the connection that this is how I keep getting pregnant. Thanks.”
I was saved from having to answer when the dishwasher burst in through the back door, pulling his apron on over his head. “What’s that?” he asked, having heard only the last remark.
“I’m pregnant again.” I smiled and walked out the back door, drink in hand.
Trifecta says: Write a 33-333 word response to the following quote: “What I tell you three times is true.” by Lewis Carroll. You do not have to use the actual quote in your response, but you may if you wish.
And, for the record, what I said three times is true. 🙂